lannister

85 THOUGHTS I HAD WHILST DEVOURING THE GAME OF THRONES SEASON 7 FINALE

1. I never get tired of seeing the Stark banner over Winterfell
2. Please don’t let the Stark sisters kill each other.
3. The juxtaposition of unsullied alongside Dothraki is pleasing
4. Tyrion on Kings Landing’: ‘the brothels are far superior’ season 1 flashbacks.
5. The Hound baiting the trapped ice zombie is giving me Walking Dead vibes
6. A dragon arena? Why have we never heard of this before?
7. Presumably because there were no more dragons.
8. Now only 2 *sob*
9. A Tyrion, Pod and Bronn reunion!


10. And Brienne and The Hound! All the feels. Look at them discussing Arya like proud parents.
11. Oooh will Bronn defect to Tyrion, or is he all brotherly with Jamie now?
12. They are all in one place and my brain can’t cope
13. So why isn’t Dany here? Sorry – Daenerys.
14. Is she still mourning Viscerion? I know I am.
15. Cleganebowl teaser: ‘ you know who’s coming for you, you’ve always known’. Grab some chicken people.
16. DRAGON ALERT!
17. Just in case they forgot who she was and all. Dragon Queen, Mother of Dragons etc etc.
18. Cersei’s expression is pricesless – they’ve lost before they have even begun
19. Dany’s hair is intricately on point as always this season.
20. ‘My apologies’ translation: ‘I have never been less sorry’


21. Euron stop interrupting – he is the rude drunk uncle at a family gathering who everyone pretends not to know.
22 ‘We are a group of people who does not like one another’ understatement of the year.
23. Jon really has improved his public speaking.
24. Enter the Hound with an early christmas present for them all this winter…
25. Why isn’t it moving? They don’t die surely?
26. There we go – zombie city
27. Even Jamie froze at the monster made flesh. Rotting flesh but still.
28. Of course Qyburn wants an undead hand.
29. Cersei is just letting Euron run away scared? WHAAAT?
30.She’s agreeing to a truce? That easily?
31. No, of course not. Trying to force Jon to be neutral. Good luck with that.
32. ‘I ask it only of Ned Stark’s son’ Yep just namedrop the father you murdered.
33. Plus he ISN’T Ned’s son, but I digress…


34.’I cannot serve two queens ‘ you tell her Jon. Daenerys looks equally frustrated and adoring.
35. ‘Have you every considered learning how to lie? Oh Tyrion its like you don’t know Jon at all
36. ‘When enough people make false promised word’s stop meaning anything’ Well said Jon. You listening Donald?
37.. Is Tyrion going to trade his life for their allegiance? By the old gods and the new I hope not.
38.’ I don’t want to destroy our family I never have’ really Tyrion? Because your new queen might have something to say about that.
39. ‘Put an end to me’ you are standing in front of your murderous sister asking her to kill you, really not a great plan…
40.The axe does not fall. Does she hate him less that we thought?
41. They do both share a love of wine


42. And so Cersei’s pregnancy is discovered. That must be why she didn’t touch the wine
43. Jon and Dany are falling more in love with every passing second: ’has it occurred to you she might not have been a reliable source of information’ the witch who murdered my husband? Nah she seems legit. Good point Snow, good point.
44. ‘I will march my armies North to fight alongside you’ surely not? I know she wants her unborn child to live, but this is a rather pleasant outcome considering,well, her.
45. Back at Winterfell Littlefinger is breeding more discontent
46. Oh Sansa don’t fall for it. He wants you alone and unprotected. To use your pain for his advantage
47. However I do believe that Arya could kill Sansa. She has threatened as much after all.
48. Arya never wanted to be ‘Lady of Winterfell’ that I do know. However she is perfectly capable of killing a sister she believes ‘betrayed’ the family. judgemental much little Stark? #teamsansa


49. I love seeing Jon and Daenerys working together, it gives me goosebumps: ‘I am not coming to conquer the north, I am coming to save the north’.
50. Oh poor Theon, what a miracle you are still alive
51 ‘You always knew what was right’ and just like that he and Jon are brothers back at Winterfell. My heart is sore
52. ‘You’re a Greyjoy, and your a Stark’ WILL. NOT. CRY.
53. Theon is finding the hero’s clothes rather suit him after all.
54. His grin when the insubordinate sailor fails to knee him in his (non-existent) manhood is a beautiful, blood-covered picture.
55. Sansa is brooding back in the north. This can’t be good. Please don’t let the sisters kill each other Please please please.
56. ‘How do you answer these charges…LORD BAELISH!!!!!’
57. Can’t type – doing a happy dance!!! YES YES YES YES.
58. Did I mention YES.


59. ‘Which charges confuse you’ Sansa is FIERCE
60. ‘None of your were there’ – are we forgetting the three eyed raven formerly known as Bran?
61. I’m so happy right now I even like Bran
62. The student has become the master ‘ sometimes I play a little game…I’m a slow learner, but I learn.’
63. Killed with his own dagger. Revenge is sweet. Helps to have an assassin as a sister and an all-seeing brother.
64. Ah so Cersei’s true colours are revealed once more. No deal. Just more lies. Should have known.
65. ‘Let the monsters kill each other’ including you Cersei?
66. She has bought mercenaries with ELEPHANTS? I look forward to seeing that
67. Euron DIDN’T flee? Curveball.
68. She is threatening to kill JAMIE? She really has gone mad.


69. And so the Oathkeeper finally leaves his Queen Well done Jamie. Well done.
70. Sam finally returned North.
71. Sam is all of us in this moment: ‘I remember everything’ *smiles nicely and pretends to understand*
72. And now the true parentage is finally said OUT LOUD.
73. R+L=J
74. You wouldn’t be forgetting who drew your attention to this secret marriage of Jon’s parents which changes everything, would you Sam? WOULD YOU?
75.. We know the truth Gilly
76. Shame Rhaegar has Viscerys wig, but otherwise a beautiful wedding
77. Jon’s name is AEGON????
78.. This is a lot to take in, especially while watching him make love to his aunt


79. I can’t help but be pleased for them. Is that wrong?
80. Of course we can’t end happily, so we return to Eastwatch.
81. The dead have come. And they brought a dragon
82. Oh Viscerion how you’ve changed. *cries into laptop*


83. RUN TORMUND RUN
84. The wall has fallen, and the dead march on. Roll on Season 8. VALAR MORGHULIS
85. But if Dany dies we riot.

 

 

 

 

 

 

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JAIME’S TOP 5 SEASON 6 MOMENTS – GAME OF THRONES COUNTDOWN

Rally the realm – only 5 days to go until we return to the bloody shores of Westeros, where the gods are old and new, where fear cuts deeper than swords, and where, inevitably, all men must die.

To celebrate the start of season 7, on each of the 7 days (see what I’m doing here) leading up to our return to the 7 kingdoms I will recap a character’s best bits of season 6 – a year when kings died, fire reigned and a girl was definitely someone.

*Season 6 spoilers – obviously*

Here are JAIME LANNISTER’S TOP 5 MOMENTS of season 6

JAIME THE COMFORTER

One of the few softer scenes for the Kingslayer this season, talking Cersei out of her black hole – but to what end?

JAIME V FANATICISM

After his weakling son fails to kick the sparrow off his perch, Jaime gives it a go. While not entirely successful in brewing fear in the fanatic, it IS nice to see someone stand up to his holiness, if only for a moment.Bravo Jamie, thanks for trying.

JAIMIE’S THREAT

This is old school Jaime, but with added bitterness. All mannerly brutality and genteel swagger – a truly terrifying prospect for the gutsy Tully, who, lets face it, never stood much of a chance…

JAIME’S BETTER ANGELS

Jaime and Brienne! Together again! Sure he tries to play it cool, and revert back to his callous ways, but his last line of this scene is telling – he doesn’t want to fight the angel on his shoulder, he values her too much.

JAIME IS NOT A FREY

Yes they are both kingslayers, but no, they are NOT the same.

 

 

CERSEI’S TOP 5 SEASON 6 MOMENTS

Rally the realm – only one week to go until we return to the bloody shores of Westeros, where the gods are old and new, where fear cuts deeper than swords, and where, inevitably, all men must die.

To celebrate the start of season 7, on each of the 7 days (see what I’m doing here) leading up to our return to the 7 kingdoms I will recap a character’s best bits of season 6 – a year when kings died, fire reigned and a girl was definitely someone.

*Season 6 spoilers – obviously*

 

Here are CERSEI LANNISTER’S TOP 5 MOMENTS of season 6

YES most of these are from the final episode. NO I have no SHAME (nudge nudge) because that episode was EPIC for the Lannister Lioness.

 

CERSEI CHOOSES

After the events of of last season she – wisely – decides to stay the hell away from the sparrow and his minions, and enlists her handy friend Franken-Mountain to really hammer the point home – the lady is not for shaming.

CERSEI HAS A CUNNING PLAN

Tommen really is a brat. He has everything, fights for nothing, then turns on his – admittedly difficult – mother by outlawing her one viable escape from the sparrows – SHAME TOMMEN. Luckily Cersei isn’t out of of options because unlike Tommen she has a mind of her own. A rather bloodthirsty one, perhaps, but still.

CERSEI PLAYS WITH FIRE

RIP Margaery…and HALF THE CITY. If at first you don’t succeed – bring the house down. Apparently. The music and direction of this sequence is stunning. They say Nero drank while Rome burned – you a fan Ms Lannister?

CERSEI > SHAME

I would feel sorry for the Septa, were it not patently obvious she enjoys tormenting her ‘sinful charges’. As it is I’m rather team Cersei on this one. Though I would be the first to scream if left in a room with the zombie Mountain from the black lagoon. What is under that helmet? Do we want to know? Probably not.

CERSEI RULES OK?

She has no more children left to love. Her cheekbones must now be her only redeeming feature. That and her thirst for power at any cost – Cersei dons her very best ‘Disney Villain’ attitude and takes the throne.

TYWIN’S TOP FIVE GAME OF THRONES MOMENTS

With 9 days to go I am featuring my first (but not my last) dearly departed character. Well, maybe not dearly. Dastardly would be closer to the mark. Yes, it’s Tywin Lannister, once the puppet-master behind the iron throne, latterly found dead and holey on his toilet. How the mighty have fallen doesn’t quite cut it.

1. Flesh and Blood

Unflinching, and unafraid of getting his hands dirty – although not a friend to the animals.

2. Making an Entrance

Better late than never, eh Cersei?

3. The King’s Bedtime

Even sadists have grandparents

4. Legacy

The meaning of life, according to Tywin. Spoiler -It’s not love and happiness.

5. Bad Blood

Just in case you were starting to like him, the lion bears his bigoted claws.

View Daernery’s top 5 moments here

View the Hound’s top 5 moments here

View Sansa’s top 5 moments here

View Jamie’s top 5 moments here

View Margaery’s top 5 moments here

View Cersei’s top 5 moments here

JAMIE’S TOP FIVE GAME OF THRONES MOMENTS

10 Days until we return to the seven kingdoms, and my sixth countdown piece features the golden boy himself – Jamie Lannister. Is he evil or misunderstood? Kingslayer or Oathkeeper? Hero or villain? I doubt the old gods or the new have the answer to that  one.

  1. TABOO

Closing the first episode with incest and attempted child murder – Jamie really set the tone of things to come.

2. PRISONER

You would think a man who sleeps with his sister would be kinder to his cousin.

3. CLEAN

He lost a hand but gained a heart.

4. BROTHERLY LOVE

The kingslayer brothers share family secrets.

5. DAUGHTER

The reason we all hate Ellaria Sand – never kiss a Dornish woman.

View Sansa’s top 5 moments here

View the Hound’s top 5 moments here

View Cersei’s top 5 moments here

View Daenerys’ top 5 moments here

View Margaery’s top 5 moments here